Saturday, April 7, 2012

G is for Guarantee

Guaranteed to confuse...

I was shopping the other day when a sales associate came up to me. Looking to encourage me to purchase, he informed me cheerfully that the item I was looking at came with a 'guarantee'.

"Really?", I asked, "What kind of guarantee?"

"A Lifetime Guarantee", he informed me proudly.

"Whose lifetime?", I asked immediately.

"Huh??"

"Whose lifetime?", I repeated slowly. He just looked at me, puzzled.

"Whose lifetime is it guaranteed to last through? Yours...? Mine...?"

"Uhh... I don't know. No one's ever asked me that." (There's a long pause here, while I stare at him patiently, waiting for the obvious to occur to him.) "I could go ask my manager.", he finally said.

"You could do that", I replied, "I'll be right here."


Shortly, he returns to inform me that it is "guaranteed for the lifetime of the product".

"So the guarantee runs out when the product "dies" by not working anymore?", I asked.

"Right!" He's all smiles now, probably feeling very smart and successful for having found the answer to my question. I hated to disillusion him, but...

"You just told me that the guarantee is only good until the product stops working. That doesn't sound like much of an advantage. I wouldn't need a guarantee while it was still working, would I?"


This time, while he was off asking his manager, I just slipped out quietly...



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This post is part of the 2012 A-to-Z Blogging Challenge!!
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19 comments:

  1. Thanks for making me laugh by sharing this interesting interaction :)

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  2. Hi...I'm hopping over from the A to Z challenge. Lovely post...good luck with the challenge.

    Donna L Martin
    www.donasdays.blogspot.com

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  3. LOL! That's funny. I must try that sometime.

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  4. I loved that post...so funny and witty..my husband does this stuff all the time and leaves people with that blank stare...Thanks for sharing!

    http://quietforgiveness.blogspot.com/

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  5. That was funny! HA!

    I'm a new follower from the AtoZ challenge. Nice to meet you.

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  6. LOL! Common sense is never common.

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  7. Great! Thanks for the early morning humor with my coffee. Who hasn't been on the wrong end of lousy customer service?

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  8. i love confusing people! thanks for the great story. i like how you just kept asking questions. they were good questions!!! haha.

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  9. A-Z Challenge hopper here too, but think I'll stop by again if you post more like this. A great catch out of one of those pesky salesmen - (apologies to any passing salesmen just trying their best to do their job)

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  10. I am a new follower from the challenge. This was an awesome start to my day. A guarantee these days is not worth much, as you have demonstrated.

    I have a funny one for you: My ten year old son & friends were selling lemonade and Popsicle door to door to our friends and neighbors on the street. My friend later told me that my son stated, "they come with an out the door guarantee."

    "What kind of guarantee is that?" She asked.

    "They are guaranteed until I get out the door." He was being funny and it did not really apply to his type of product, but it is pretty much how I view most guarantees I receive today.

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  11. Hi, I'm dropping in from the Challenge. Really enjoyed your post. You're right, those guarantees are such a joke. New follower here.

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  12. Nah, that's not confusing. It's mind-boggling. :P



    The Golden Eagle
    The Eagle's Aerial Perspective

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  13. Nah, it's not confusing. It's mind-boggling. :P



    The Golden Eagle
    The Eagle's Aerial Perspective

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  14. yeah that's about right, not really counting on the guarantee!

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  15. Ah yes, you're one of THOSE people . . .

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  16. Now that is funny. At least he tried to offer some sort of customer service. I remember walking around a super Wal Mart trying to find a lunch box. I asked a blue vested person, "Where are the lunch boxes?" She looked at me blankly and said "I don't know." Then she walked off. And never returned.

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  17. ho poor guy, I work in retails, we do sell some extended guarantee on stuff but at least us, if the item doesn't work, bring it back we exchange it or refund you end of story no fiss and fuss XD ... HO god I need to stop working XD Hi from another Blog CHallenger :D

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  18. Brings to mind a movie line: "I weep for the future." (Ferris Beuller's Day Off)

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